To contemplate is to deeply consider in profound open mindedness;
to ‘return’ prior to thoughts, meanings, definitions, interpretations & beliefs.
To ‘shine the light of awareness’, to illuminate, to dispel,
such that the true nature is untangled, uncovered, and unfettered.
A subject-object thought implies two; a subject, and an object.
When you are the subject or object of a subject-object thought, the discord is felt.
While it may seem that the discord is felt because the thought is true,
the discord is actuality felt because the thought is not true.
You are not ‘in’ a thought.
You are not defined by thought.
You are not ‘in’ a thought story.
You are not the character of thought narrative.
You are not in a past.
You are not in a future.
You are not the character imagined to have a past.
You are not the character imagined to have a future.
You are not the character imagined to be in a present.
You are not ‘a thinker of thoughts’.
You are awareness, aware of arising thoughts.
You are what words like freedom & creativity can only point to.
One can not think oneself.
The call for this contemplation is suffering, namely; existential rumination, anxiety, or depression.
Mental anguish, misery, or, suffering, is the experience of feeling…
and a resistant thought.
The resistant thought is believed to be true.
The feeling of discord is believed to be because the thought is true.
The feeling of discord arises precisely because, the thought is not true.
Awareness is aware of thoughts.
All thoughts.
No thought ever defines the awareness,
which is prior to & aware of…thoughts.
Nancy looks in the mirror each morning, see’s that she is aging, and is concerned. She believes her beauty is slipping away, or slowly being lost. She worries she will not be attractive, and is concerned for what other people might think of her appearance. She carries on nonetheless, ‘suffering through’… applying her make up, brushing her hair, plucking and tweezing… all the while believing arising thoughts about herself, and of her beauty slipping away, and of what others may think.
Nancy is experiencing subject-object thoughts. In accordance with the thought, Nancy is the subject, and beauty is the object. Nancy’s assumption is that beauty is, or is not, hers. She does not readily spot this, because she does not recognize her assumption, which can be spotted in recognizing the twoness of the subject-object thought. From Nancy’s discordant (suffering) perspective, beauty is something separate from her, which she had or has, but is losing.
Nancy inspects this thought by checking her direct experience. The subtle implication of the subject-object thought, is the claim that Nancy (subject) has beauty (object, separate of Nancy). The concern is losing, or that Nancy could lose the beauty she believes she ‘has’.
Nancy recognizes the assumption -
that beauty is a thing she has, or possesses.
Nancy inspects her direct experience, for what is actual…
What is the beauty I have?
Where do I have this beauty?
Where did beauty come from?
When did I get, or acquire this beauty I have?
How did I obtain this beauty?
How could I lose beauty?
From inspecting direct experience, Nancy realizes the untrue subject-object implication of the thought. Nancy begins to realize beauty was never an object or ‘thing’ which she had… and that beauty can not be found or pointed to, because beauty is the true nature of what Nancy is. The beauty she truly is, is all around her, never truly coming or going, but eternal, self-evident, and ever-present for all to see.
Nancy experiences the repetition of the subject-object thought the next morning in the mirror again, and she again feels the discord. However, she is now aware of subject-object thoughts. In spotting, or recognizing the separative implication of the thought… as the thought implies Nancy and beauty are separate, she feels relief, and the presence of the true nature, the beauty she Is.
In recognizing the habitual nature of subject-object thoughts, Nancies interrupts the pattern, by writing on her bathroom mirror with a bar of soap…
‘Beauty is not a thing that is mine.
The beauty felt, is the beauty I Am.’
This helps Nancy to more easily recognize why the subject-object thought was not resonating. She sees clearly why she was feeling discord & suffering.
Nancy’s experience by & large begins to shift, as Nancy begins to recognize the beauty of the true nature is present in & as all things, and that she is not separate, but was only believing subject-object thoughts which made it seem so.
As awareness of subject-object thoughts she experiences insight, or, ‘seeing through’ the appearance of separate things, and the believing of separative thoughts about herself. Nancy likes the experience of insight & clarity, and the inherent good-feeling of her nature, and momentum builds in presence of being.
Nancy continues to inspect thoughts and to self-realize, as she relinquishes comparative thoughts, such as comparing herself to others, or being concerned about what others might think of her. She recognizes when others are believing subject-object and or comparative thoughts, and understands & feels compassion where there once was suffering.
Nancy begins to realize and feel more & more deeply that she is beauty, she is beautiful, she is intelligence, she is love, she is peace. Nancy enjoys the bonding experience of connectedness, rather than continuing to impose separation upon herself, with all things, via overlooking the discord of such thoughts. Nancy’s discovery & exploration of self-realization, of the true nature, is well underway. Life is renewed in childhood innocence, or, the Buddha nature, as her heart & mind are illuminated in truth.
“How do I realize that I am good enough just as I am,
that I am not a problem that needs to be fixed?”
Frank is experiencing a subject-object thought. In accordance with the thought, Frank is the subject, and good is the object. The assumption is that Frank is not already the very goodness in question, or, that Frank is separate of, goodness - hence the implication of the subject-object, or, separative thought.
The belief is that Frank is presently not good enough. Thoughts arise in accordance with that belief, as to how Frank can realize that Frank is good enough.
In believing the thought ‘Frank is not already good’, or ‘good enough’, a secondary belief is added - that this is, or that there is, ‘a problem’.
In believing he is not already good, or not already good enough, and that there is a problem, a third belief is added - that there is, or should be, a solution to ‘the problem’.
Frank is also experiencing a subtle comparative thought. The assumption is that there is a ‘second Frank’, which Frank is comparing himself to, to derive that he is ‘not good enough’.
Frank might also be experiencing a subtle comparative thought, of comparing himself to others. The assumption is that others are not already goodness as well. The fundamental belief is that there are ‘separate selves’. That belief is reinforced, by believing the arising comparative & subject-object thoughts.
In spotting, or uncovering the subject-object and comparative thoughts, Frank now understands why these thoughts do not resonate, or, feel good. In understanding this, Frank chooses to spend a few minutes each day utilizing simple affirmations and meditations, oriented to feeling. Over the course of a few days, Frank is feeling more & more relief from the old thoughts, and is beginning to discover the true nature, or, the very oneness which the subject-object thoughts were in discord with. Frank has ‘found’ the very goodness ‘sought’ within himself, by inspecting and relinquishing the thoughts which veiled, or seemed to ‘cover up’ the goodness Frank is.
Going prior is a natural & effortless experience of alignment;
an unfettering of discord, with no more than the recognition that
awareness is already prior to thought(s).
This is a simple & straightforward way to see clearly
through, bursting the bubbles of thought attachment & limiting beliefs.
To recognize the content of thought(s),
from the experience of thought(s).
(See ‘Bursting Your Bubbles - From Beliefs To Clarity’)
Notice, whatever is ‘on your mind’,
‘weighing you down’ - creating discord;
is nowhere to be found in
perception or feeling.
Now notice the ‘this & that’,
duality of thought, ‘itself’;
up & down,
left & right,
north & south,
me & you,
ours & theirs,
I & him,
me & myself,
I & myself,
I & I,
etc,
etc,
etc.
(See ‘Subject-Object Thoughts’, ‘What Is a Self Referential Thought”,
Self Referential Thoughts, and The Emotional Scale.)
Consider (discordant) thought as analogous to a stray cat;
when no longer fed (attention),
it (the discordant thought)
simply stops ‘coming around’.
(discord is no longer created)
Notice all arising thoughts are,
of the dualistic, or, twoness -
‘this or that’ flavor.
Notice, that there is, an experience of; thoughts.
Notice awareness is aware of; thoughts.
Consider an analogy of a book, as thought(s);
The book is, the book.
Upon reading a few pages,
the content seems to whisk you off,
into a story.
Notice;
you are not in,
the story.
The story is content.
The book is, the book.
The ‘story’ of thought, is the content,
or, what the thought
appears to be about.
While thought is - thought.
Notice, awareness is aware of, thoughts.
Notice, you, are awareness.
Notice only awareness is, aware.
Notice, you, awareness, are not ‘in’
‘the story’ / thoughts.
But are aware of,
thoughts.
The experience of believing self referential thoughts, or,
of ‘getting sucked into thoughts’,
is like Grand Central Station and the trains which come & go.
Notice, when believing thoughts,
when getting ‘sucked into the thought story’,
it is as if you left Grand Central Station,
and are on one of the trains.
Notice, you are Grand Central Station,
as you, awareness, do not come & go.
It is only the beliving of self referral thoughts,
which makes it seem so.
For a visual bird’s eye vantage point of Going Prior,
use the backside of your dreamboard (or a pen & paper)
and write the thought on the backside and have look.
Look specifically for I, me, my, myself, and mine,
and question, who am I believing these thoughts are about?
Notice again, awareness is aware,
of the thoughts.
(See I Am)
Write down the thought or thoughts which are on your mind, which feel resistant. There is no right or wrong way to phrase the thoughts. Anything you write down will do just fine. Write earnestly, honestly, and express to the best of your ability. The more you allow yourself to write, the more information there will be to see from a new perspective.
Then, from the vantage of visually seeing what you wrote down, contemplate, consider:
“what thoughts am I focused on?”.
Sometimes, we can get ‘lost in’ the content of thoughts, missing we are focusing on thoughts, and not actual situations which are happening, and unchecked, this can go on for some time. ‘Going prior’ helps to acknowledge and more clearly see what thoughts we are focusing on, and how we are focusing, and how this relates to how we are feeling.
This will make it much easier to spot the nature, intention, and sentiment behind the thoughts, with respect to why they don’t feel good, or, aren’t resonating with your true nature.
More specifically, this will reveal on your dreamboard or paper for you to see and be aware of, what can often be difficult to see ‘in your head’. Look for the content of what you’ve written down. Look for the distinction between thoughts which are about you, and thoughts which are about what you want.
Mindfully, purposefully, consciously, without effort or strain - shift from thoughts about you, to focusing on thoughts about what you want. Feel the relief of this ‘taking the pressure off yourself’ shift.
It can be most helpful & clarifying, if you have been focused on what you do not want for some time… to ‘empty your cup’ by writing everything you are aware you do not want down on paper as well. Then step away, take a break, breathe, relax, go for a walk, listen to some music, anything easy for you, which feels good to you. Then, return to the list, and write the opposite next to each line. You will then have an insightful list of what you do want, which feels good to focus on, because it is what you want - which is what feels good, to you. Write that list on your Dreamboard.
Note the feeling of relief, the raise in vibration, as you transition in terms of focus, from inward thoughts about yourself, to outward thoughts about what you are creating & experiencing via what thoughts you are focusing on… and about what you desire to create & experience, and what thoughts you prefer to focus on.
(For more on focusing on what you do want, see Improv Writing.)
This can be most helpful in illuminating a misunderstood and or suppressed emotion. This can also reveal to you limiting beliefs which you may have innocently created, about who you are and what you are capable of creating in your life - a belief which may surface when thoughts arise about what you do want. This is a natural facet of the experience of life, and of emotions, and you are certainly not alone in experiencing this. Feel good for looking into this, for addressing, for expressing, for aligning, as this is orienting into the natural flow of well-being, or, self-love.
For help with understanding, releasing, and expressing emotions, please see the Emotional Scale, and Expressive Journaling.
Remember, or openly consider, this place & this life is in and of itself an expression of your inner most limitless true nature. Feel the alignment with source in the releasing of any limiting beliefs about yourself. Feel the shift in expressing your unique desires, of what you would like to create and experience.
Feel the Truth of your creatorship.
Jane is all too aware she no longer desires her current job, which she once applied for and was happy to receive, sometime ago. Since then, Jane has experienced more of what she does prefer, and does not prefer, and new desires have arisen within Jane with respect to what she now, prefers more so.
Jane is experiencing the ‘stuckness’ of resistant momentum, in focusing on thoughts about what she does not want about her current job, and or resistant self referential thoughts. Jane has not yet written these thoughts down, and is experiencing discordant rumination, or, excessive thinking about scenarios which Jane does not want, which do not resonate or feel good to Jane, for some time now.
Jane writes down a list of what she knows she does not want, and then the opposite list of what she does want. Jane experiences emotional and bodily relief via expressing, as if putting down a weight she has unknowingly been carrying. Jane also experiences less fear, confusion, worry or concern going forward, as she has aligned thought with feeling, via acknowledging and honoring her desires & preferences, or simply put, her wanting.
Jane begins to create a new momentum of good feeling, in the orientation of focusing on what she does want - by focusing on thoughts about it, and about herself having it, which feel good for Jane.
Jane begins to feel empowerment and enthusiasm, and a renewed appreciation for life & the job she has, which is now seen as a stepping stone helping her to know, focus on, and thus create & experience, the job or career change she now knows she wants more.
Jane’s overall mood, energy, vibration, and quality of life experience, in having aligned with the boundless creativity of what is, and what can be, through her role as a creator and expresser of preferences - increases exponentially. Jane notices the gorgeous blue of the sky, and the enchanting chirping of the birds again as she did when she was young, for honoring the unique song within herself, and no longer holding herself apart from the dream within her heart.
I Am
“I am” is a thought.
The distinction implied by this thought is:
that I am, vs, I am not.
What is aware of the thought - “I am not”?
Awareness is aware of the thought, “I am not”.
The thought “I am” points within,
to awareness which is aware of the apparent thought, “I am”.
Awareness is not a thing; awareness is being all things, by being all thoughts.
Awareness is aware of, awareness.
Appearance requires ten thousand names.
Truth is always pointed to with the very same name;
I
“Three things cannot remain hidden for long;
the moon, the sun, and the truth.”
The Buddha
“You are essential, not accidental”
Colby Wedgeworth, Jordan Feliz, Paul Duncan
Creator-Creating-Creation Contemplation
Sit comfortably somewhere you will have some time to yourself without being disturbed. Put your devices aside. Slow things down with the more ‘hands on’ feeling approach of using a pen or pencil & a pad of paper or journal.
Take a few slow, deep, big breaths into your stomach, expanding your stomach fully, and exhaling slowly. Allow the body to relax as you feel the expansion of the bigger, deeper, slower breaths. Feel your muscles sink into the comfort of gravity as you do. Allow your shoulders to sink, and the muscles of your neck, face, jaw, stomach, waistline, arms, legs, hands and feet - to release & relax.
Clear your mind by bringing attention to perception & feeling. While continuing to feel the sensation of breathing & relaxing deeply, be aware of the multiplicity of colors & textures of seeing, and the varying depths in perception. Allow it to be seen that there are no actual separations in perception.
Notice the empty space of perception. Allow it to be seen that there is no separate between the array of colors and textures of perception, and the empty space of perception.
While taking a few more relaxing, deep, slow stomach breaths, bring all attention to hearing. Hear the oneness, the totality, of sound. Be aware of specific sounds, and mindfully notice there is, at the same time, no actual separation in any literal sense, found in sound.
Allow seeing, hearing, sensation & relaxation to envelope you. Listen & feel within the body. Hear the silence, feel the peace, within the body. Allow it to be as it is - that there is no separation found in direct experience. Generously allow yourself this peace of mind of being present as this moment, just as you are.
Bring to the forefront of your experience appreciation for this moment, as it is. In mindfully allowing this moment to be what it is, as it is, without condition or expectation… feel the sensation of appreciation & reverence for the simple & ordinary abundance of all which constitutes this moment as it is. Again, take a few deep slow breaths feeling sensation throughout the body as you do. Notice the abundance of seeing, hearing and feeling ever-present in this moment.
Let go of expectations, desired outcomes, thoughts of taking action, concerns of making decisions, and or of getting or obtaining anything or figuring anything out. Empty the vessel of the body-mind by imagining the feeling of it being an empty, wide open & spacious antenna for receiving, fully equipped in it’s emptiness; whole, compete & perfect in it’s ability to receive wisdom & insight from the ever-present fullness of our source.
Simply write down a question you’d like insight, clarification, guidance, support or healing with on your paper. Keep your questions relevant to you & your life.
As the answer arises from the source within, write the answer down.
Take this exercise in whatever direction you like. You might probe more deeply into a subject matter for which you desire to receive a healing, releasing, clarifying & comforting insight or message.
You might ask questions specifically oriented to guidance for the way forward in matters of your life.
You might ask for understanding & compassion for the people & events of your past.
You might ask for guidance in ways you can be a vessel of help & change for a friend, a spouse or significant other, your parents or children, your community, or for our planet.
Feel & bask in the alignment of, with & as the true nature & reality of the source of all experience.
When you feel this exercise has come to a natural completion for now, again take a few deep breaths and express sincere appreciation for this moment just as it is, and for the guidance and ever-present communion of source.
